Jay Shetty & Ed Mylett ON Become a Time and Energy Management Expert

On this episode of On Purpose, Jay Shetty welcomes his friend Ed Mylett, a successful entrepreneur and motivational speaker.

They explore the power of intention and action, speaking truth with kindness and compassion, and the keys to unlocking your full potential. 

They discuss overcoming obstacles, embracing change, and cultivating resilience on the path to success. Additionally, they reflect on the concept of time and its malleability, allowing listeners to gain insights into maximizing their time, achieving success, and changing their lives.

Overcoming Constant Worrying

As a young child, Ed Mylett was the son of an alcoholic father. He shared with Jay Shetty his personal struggle with worry and fear stemming from his childhood experiences. His upbringing wired him to constantly worry about his father's safety. By doing so, he created a pattern of worry and fear in his adult life. 

However, it is crucial to rewire your emotional responses. Mylett chooses positive emotions such as peace and equanimity over worry and fear. Similarly, Jay Shetty found solace in his mother's love even though the environment was sometimes chaotic.

Mylett got so used to living in chaos that he actively tried to recreate this environment without even noticing. He admitted to Jay Shetty, "I wasn't comfortable when things weren't a little bit chaotic. Because in life, we move towards really what we're most familiar with, we keep moving back to the familiar."  Now, he is trying to consciously transition to a state of peace and equanimity and hopes to serve as a positive example for others going through similar struggles.

Anchored in Your Body

Ed Mylett explained to Jay Shetty that certain emotions are also anchored in the physical body. Feelings get associated with movement, or sensory experiences. Anchoring positive states in the body are one way of combating stress and anxiety. 

Mylett told Jay Shetty that we can actively train our bodies to associate positive emotions with certain actions and even rewire our brains to change these connections. By doing so, we can trigger a peaceful state when needed, effectively rewiring his neurology.  

It is important to consciously retrain the negative anchored states to promote peace and positivity. If lying down triggers breathlessness and anxiety, it is crucial to change that association in your mind. To be in control of the narrative, it is better to consciously influence your emotional well-being, rather than allowing external conditions to dictate your feelings.

Audit Your Life

Another change that Ed Mylett discussed with Jay Shetty revolved around making better decisions and better managing your energy levels. Mylett emphasized the importance of saying no and prioritizing activities that bring him joy. Rather than focusing on being productive, he chose to do the things that gave him a sense of contribution.

Mylett has a busy schedule, starting his days early and traveling regularly. Yet he learned to assess which of his actions align with his current dreams and bring him peace and joy. He gave the example of Jim Carrey, who once said that he decided to pursue activities that bring him peace and joy rather than simply chasing success. This approach involves prioritizing mental and physical well-being. Mylett makes sure to stay hydrated and maintain a positive mindset.

Purify Your Intentions

Good intentions can have a positive impact on your life. Ed Mylett shared with Jay Shetty an encounter with Wayne Dyer, in which Dyer emphasizes the importance of linking confidence to intentions rather than abilities. Having pure intentions and serving others can create genuine confidence. This is also Mylett's approach to life, which allows him to radiate positive energy and vibrate at a high frequency.

Jay Shetty agrees. A crucial part of his morning routine also consists of refining and purifying intentions. Jay compares intentions to seeds and weeds - it is important to nurture positive intentions while recognizing and addressing negative ones. He eliminates the ones that serve other purposes than love, service, and joy.

It is, therefore, important to become conscious of your intentions and understand if they come from a positive or negative place. The process of "weeding out" negative thoughts has a transformative power, as Jay and Ed Mylett note. Try to foster genuine and positive intentions for personal growth and meaningful connections with others.

Validating Intentions with Actions

Ed Mylett believes that good intentions need to be validated with actions. He admits to Jay Shetty that he used to be judgmental of others. However, in the past decade he tried to change his behavior for the better. He worked on feeling better himself and extending grace to others, even when it may seem undeserved.

As an example, Mylett shared with Jay Shetty how he once gave the benefit of the doubt to a family with noisy and seemingly ill-behaved children. They were dining in a restaurant, and the children were disturbing everyone at another table. Instead of judging, however, he chose to pray for them with his children and then bought their dinner. Some days later, he found out by chance that that particular family was coming back from the funeral of a loved one, and they were not feeling themselves. 

Mylett continued to explain how we can never know what others are going through. After this experience, his commitment to show kindness and withhold judgment only increased. He recommends doing this exercise - validate your good intentions with actions. Try to be understanding and compassionate, as the other person may be fighting an unseen battle.

Avoid Toxic Environments

Even good-hearted people often feel surrounded by negativity and toxicity, which can be exhausting. As a solution, Mylett suggested reducing proximity to negative people. Conversely, it is important to have a safe haven—places or people—to retreat for perspective and support. This approach can almost feel therapeutic.

Mylett believes that true greatness involves "walking into a room and shifting the energy" rather than adapting to it. He told Jay Shetty that it is important to also speak the truth. He believes it beneficial to approach negative people and remind them of the good nature inside of them. Mylett believes that truth vibrates at the highest frequency, which is essential for maintaining positive energy.

To positively influence others, Mylett emphasizes the importance of building trust and showing belief in them before challenging them to improve. He explains to Jay Shetty, "First, you have to make deposits into people before you can make withdrawals."

Ripple Effect

In order to create change, it is essential to be considerate. Being genuinely kind wins over being strategically nice. Jay Shetty and Ed Mylett note that "truth is what shifts the room" and encourage people to speak from a place of love and honesty. Being vulnerable and revealing imperfections connects people, as authenticity and vulnerability enable us to influence and uplift others. Even if it may seem difficult at times, you can always make a difference.

When Mylett's father decided to get sober, it transformed their family's life. Mylett reflected on the ripple effect of this decision - someone else's help enabled his father's sobriety, ultimately impacting millions through Mylett's own success. He also noted that the one who helped his father was someone who managed to escape his own struggles. So, he concluded that these people are "most qualified to help the person [they] used to be." 

Jay Shetty introduces a loving-kindness meditation, recalling moments of deep love. Through this meditation, you can cultivate and radiate that feeling. Jay explains that reliving these moments can generate an endless supply of love, which you can share with others and create a continuous cycle of positive energy.

Jay Shetty and Ed Mylett agreed that we need both spirituality and productivity to live a fulfilling life. Jay suggests that a mindset change is only the starting point. However, to create a new reality, you also need to take action. Intention without action is insufficient. For a meaningful outcome, he suggests considering actionable steps that will take you closer to your goal.

Moreover, Mylett believes that decisions must be validated through actions - "truth is what shifts the room." He shares with Jay Shetty that much of his confidence stems from his work ethic, a lesson he learned from his father. In his view,  true validation of your decisions comes from consistent effort and tangible actions.

Bending Time

Mylett explained that he rejects the traditional 24-hour day schedule. Instead, he structures his day into three 8-hour "days" within one day, effectively creating 21 days in a week. He maximizes his productivity with the use of modern technology. When something is scarce, it's more valuable," he says. Mylett's day starts at 6 AM and ends at midnight, divided into three "mini-days" where he aims to achieve the productivity of a full day within each segment.

This unusual approach allows him to assess and adapt his methods regularly, and to enhance overall efficiency and output. Mylett explains to Jay Shetty that many tasks, such as meetings, can be more productive if completed in significantly less time than typically allocated. By compressing and manipulating time, Mylett believes he can accomplish much more than the average person, resulting in a longer and more fulfilling life.

Finding the Right Balance

Mylett recounts being impressed by a meeting with Alex Rodriguez, where Rodriguez's disciplined approach to time management—ending meetings precisely on schedule. He notes that setting such boundaries, though potentially uncomfortable, ultimately garners respect and maintains a productive rhythm.

Mylett believes that successful people operate with a specific rhythm and cadence, leading to momentum. This rhythm involves a quicker pace and a disciplined approach to time, which, in his opinion, is crucial for achieving and maintaining success. "There's a rhythm and a cadence to life that creates momentum," he told Jay Shetty.

However, it is important to balance energy and time. Jay schedules his meetings during his high-peak energy periods, ensuring high-quality output. He also limits himself to two podcast recordings per day to ensure that he can put in the energy and presence necessary without compromise.

Both Ed Mylett and Jay Shetty emphasize the importance of being intentional when planning your schedule. As your career advances, your schedule will also change so that you can effectively manage increased time and energy demands. Mylett argues that anticipating growth and establishing supportive structures in advance is crucial for long-term success. He told Jay "Every level you climb requires a different type of energy and structure." This way, you can maintain momentum and prevent stagnation as your responsibilities increase.

The Impact of a Default Identity

Another step in growing as a person is constantly assessing your habits and structures and whether they continue to serve your goals. At some point in his life, Mylett realized that his full morning routine was becoming too time-consuming. So, he audited these routines and discarded those that no longer served his current goals.

Procrastination is an example of a habit holding us back. It stems from an internal identity crisis, where people subconsciously resist exceeding their self-imposed limits. To overcome this obstacle, Mylett recommends raising your self-identity and surrounding yourself with people who operate at higher levels. Tying your identity to external achievements and accomplishments can be tricky, he warns. Instead, it should be rooted in your character, intentions and inner values.

To increase the internal foundation of your self-esteem, Mylett recommends raising your self-identity and surrounding yourself with people who operate at higher levels. Moreover, he suggests taking action before being completely prepared to do so. Successful people, he told Jay Shetty, are willing to step into unknown situations and figure things out as they go rather than over-preparing and delaying action.

Living in the Present

A busy life needs to be counterbalanced with moments of rest, Mylett explained to Jay Shetty. He acknowledged he used to believe that constant momentum was what kept him moving forward. However, when faced with burnout, he learned to appreciate taking time off. Now, he listens to his body and spirit and allows himself to rest without fear of losing progress. If you find yourself in a state of burnout, Mylett suggests taking the time to get enough sleep and grounding in nature.

Moreover, Mylett also introduces Jay Shetty to the concept of the "three Ds"—doubt, discouragement, and delusion—which can derail your progress. Therefore, he advises recognizing and countering these negative influences and understanding they come from a place of insecurity. You can stay on course with your goals by maintaining self-awareness and addressing these feelings. 

More From Jay Shetty

Listen to the entire On Purpose with Jay Shetty podcast episode on “Ed Mylett ON #1 Habit to Become an Expert at Time and Energy Management” now in the iTunes store or on Spotify. For more inspirational stories and messages like this, check out Jay’s website at jayshetty.me.